Curt had always been a cynic, irritable, disgusted. The space around him radiated negativity. Now Stephanie’s husband had one more real reason to be so since his back surgery had left him numb from the waist down. Yes, he could still walk, hobble; but he also required a catheter in order to function. Intercourse was out of the question. The verbal lashings she received made sure that any other kind of intimacy was too. Time for another quest, a search for peace on this cool, cloudy summer evening. Stephanie headed out with the dog to walk and pray, run away, try to clear her head for the third time today. “God, if You’re there, I need a sign that tells me Dennis is OK. I am so terrified that he is suffering in hell. He was being rebellious when the accident happened. I never told him, I never knew that I should have been looking for You and teaching him about You. I have so much confusion now myself. All of my watching religious TV and searching the internet has only made me more fearful. God, help me! I am so afraid!” As she rounded the corner she came upon the neighbors walking too. “Hi! How are you? How’s your husband doing?”, Matt asked. How do I word this? she thought. She grinned a strained smile, shrugged. “He’s…” a pause. “Not doing too well?” asked Dina. “I think he’s depressed”. Matt agreed that he sure had reason to be, and so did she! “Are you taking care of yourself?”, he asked. Matt himself had recently undergone a knee replacement and had also had back surgery a few years ago, so he really understood. He had been so nice and friendly and even got Curt to snicker and smile a few months ago when he was walking by and stopped to talk. “You should check with his doctor and get something to help. There’s no reason to suffer with the new medications they have. You should check it out for yourself, too!” Matt suggested. “Well, I tried something when our son was killed, but it didn’t really help.” “Oh, no…your son was killed?" asked Dina. “I’m so sorry. What happened.” Stephanie went on to explain that it was a shooting accident. “I think I remember hearing the news when that happened! Well, no wonder he’s depressed. We’ll pray for him. What’s his name?” Instantly, she knew that God had heard her own prayer. Matt and Dina took turns telling her all of the battles they’d been through for so many years, the latest being Dina’s lay-off and also Matt’s cancer before the back and knee surgeries. “Wow. Really?!” “Are you a Christian?” she asked Dina. “Yes, I am”. Stephanie tried to hold back her excitement. “Well, I had a really close friend, our neighbor who was a Christian, and she used to beg me with tears to become one. She moved away, but even came back to help me through the grief when we lost our son.” “Would you like to come back to our house and talk some more? I need to get home and check my chicken in the oven. “Dina asked. Stephanie hesitated. “Well, I’m just starting my walk, and it really makes me feel better.” “Ok, how about I call you when we’re finished eating?” “OK, sure.” Stephanie said. Later, as they walked, they discussed all of the confusion on TV and the internet. “When Danny died, I started watching EWTN, the Catholic channel and praying the rosary. It was really comforting to me. Now I’m learning all kinds of things on the internet about the Vatican, nephilim, aliens…it’s so shocking and makes me so sad and afraid! I feel really uncomfortable even talking to you about it. Have you ever seen anything like that?” “Yes, I have. You know there’s a lot of mis-information as well as dis-information. We need to be very careful of what we believe…discerning of what we see. It’s the Holy Spirit Who guides and teaches us when we know Jesus.” “Yes, we need to be filled with the Holy Spirit, right?!” Stephanie was not just interested, and she said so. She was famished and nearly dehydrated for spiritual insight. She talked about her other Christian friends and their warnings about astrology and yoga, which she had also practiced. “I really need some answers! I’ve barely been sleeping and researching all this for two weeks straight! My husband thinks I’m losing it!”

On my mental decorating calendar, it's half-way through summer, and I've been behind ! Michael's cousin Kris is coming for a visit, so I got busy. Here's our entryway. The charcoal drawing with the bamboo frame hung in my parents' house until they moved here. Michael had insisted that we buy it for them on our honeymoon in Hawaii.

Here's a close-up of my parents' beautiful shell ashtray - Mom never smoked, but we lost her going on 3 years ago.

On to the living area mantel. I was planning to paint a seascape to be the focal point, but instead decided to grab our print of dolphins from the bathroom. I wanted an asymmetrial, refreshing look, not too matchy matchy, including some black and white photography. I started out with a large conch shell to the right of the print, moved the candle from left to right, and finally came up with this...

The pilot in the photograph is Michael's Dad, whom I never met. He passed away before Michael and I met. Besides being perfect for the black and white element, I thought Kris would like to see his uncle's picture. It also fits in with the ocean theme, since he served in the Pacific during WWII. Of course, it fits with "The Travelers" print as well. The built-in bookshelves on either side of the fireplace were feeling much too cluttered. I stored away alot of books and even left only one large item on two of them.

TA DA! Perfect for our visitor and our staycation, too!

NEW POST ON 'WHATCHA GOT' TAB TODAY!

NEW POST ON 'WHATCHA GOT' TAB TODAY! :D

Which one is not worth keeping? Just sayin'...

I actually put my ideas from yesterday's post into practice, and it worked out GREAT! Three people with pretty different perspectives actually got each other thinking in new directions. Something I should add to the very few rules would be to ask/grant permission to change the subject during discussion. Any thoughts out there in Blogland?

There are introverts and extroverts and people all up and down this spectrum. I am an introvert according to the Myers-Briggs test. You may think that means I don’t like people, but I really do. I think people are mostly like me, and most of you probably think the same way. How boring would THAT be? Gotta work on that. In fact, some of my favorite people are extreme extroverts until they…well, not going there in case you find yourself in one of my “irritating” categories! In my experience, we can learn from each other. We learn by communicating, but that’s hard to do when an introvert is afraid to be seen as pushy, and an extrovert is being a bulldozer…good way to make a mountain out of a molehill! Every emotionally and mentally healthy person wants to have a better life. Some even want to make the lives of others better. So how do we communicate in order to help ourselves and others out and accomplish some things? This post was prompted by someone on a Social Networking site wanting to know some convincing come-backs for those who get stuck on blaming. This takes place much more than it should between intelligent adults with serious concerns in many arenas of life. It’s one thing to remind someone of history, and another to stay stuck there. Regardless of intro- or extraversion, everyone please visit here first THE BLAME DUMP: Go ahead, get it all out. It's not going to make anything better. Only save what you need for later to make any point before offering your solution. Ahhhh. That feels better, doesn't it? Now, if you’re the introvert, here are some suggestions. Before or the minute a discussion starts, ask permission, or agree to discuss within guidelines. If you’re the extrovert, remember to speak little and listen much (why God gave us two ears and one mouth?). Don’t take this personally, afterall, whatever you’re discussing is important to you and those you love, right? And we’re trying to find solutions! For everyone - No namecalling with only one foul allowed. Namecaller must apologize. One foul allowed for blaming. Call FOUL when necessary! Hear them out and if there's truth, say, "That may be true. Now let's discuss your solution." If there’s more than one person in the discussion, don’t leave the refereeing to someone else. BE the facilitator when necessary – FACILITATE discussion! ...and now - DISCUSS in comments! P.S. Any friends who've told me you joined here, I can't see some of you. Please try again? And welcome to all newbies! <3